Make Me Laugh
A guy sees a sign in front of a house that reads: “Talking Dog for Sale.” He rings the bell and the owner tells him the dog is in the backyard. The guy goes into the backyard and sees a black mutt just sitting there.
“You talk?” he asks.
“Yep,” the mutt replies.
Shocked, the man says, “So, what’s your story?”
The mutt looks up and says, “Well, I discovered my gift pretty young and I wanted to help the government, so I told the CIA about my ability, and in no time they had me jetting from country to country, sitting in rooms with spies and world leaders, because no one figured a dog would be eavesdropping. I was one of their most valuable spies for eight years. The jetting around really tired me out, and I knew I wasn’t getting any younger and I wanted to settle down. So I signed up for a job at the airport to do some undercover security work, mostly wandering near suspicious characters and listening in. I uncovered some incredible dealings there and was awarded a batch of medals. I had a wife, a mess of puppies, and now I’m just retired.”
The guy is amazed. He goes back in and asks the owner what he wants for the dog.
The owner says, “$10.”
The guy says, “This dog is amazing. Why on earth are you selling him so cheap?”
The owner shrugged and replied, “He’s just a big fat liar. He didn’t do any of that stuff.”