Open Letter to All Breakfast Places: Please Stop Trying to Kill Me

I love breakfast and breakfast foods.

I know it's ironic as I often skip breakfast for 'intermittent fasting' reasons but if I'm at a restaurant that has 'breakfast all day' on the menu, there's a 99% chance I'm ordering something off the breakfast menu.

My question to most places it this: Why are y'all trying to kill me?"

There's an old saying, "Breakfast is the most important meal of the day." That phrase was coined by Kellogg. Of course he wants you to eat breakfast as that's business for him.

Presenting Exhibit A:

Three plates full of food.

And this was just for me.

Supposedly, this was set for just one person.

No way am I going to be able to eat all of this and, sure enough, I didn't. I didn't even eat half of this.

The rest of the items ordered for the rest of the table weren't as bad as far as food portions go, but wanted to show these as well.

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These were taken at Molly's Family Restaurant in Spokane Washington.

The quality of the food was phenomenal. It's no wonder why this is such a popular spot for locals in Spokane. Great food, great service, quality hot chocolate (always a must), monster portions... it's exactly what you'd look for in a family-style restaurant.

These portions, though, do not need to be this big.

I'm sure there are people who could eat all of this but I need, like, half of this order.

And, yes, you can take any leftovers to go, which we did, but, to me, breakfast leftovers don't hold as well as, say, leftovers from a Chinese restaurant or something.

Still, I appreciate the sentiment, and next time I'll know not to order something that comes with so many sides and in such high doses, but please don't try to make me burst before lunch.

Not that you're wondering, but no, I didn't even eat lunch after this breakfast. I was good until later that night.