Honestly, These Are The 5 Worst Places to Meet a Mate in Yakima

WELP, I am a single gal again. Actually, I've been single this whole time but I truly thought I was in a relationship with this one guy. Looking back on it, we had what the cool kids are now calling a "situationship". See, this guy and I have been "talking" for almost exactly five months but get this, he has never officially asked me out on a date. NOT ONCE. Can you believe I waited that long, hoping that any minute he would say the words I longed to hear, "Let's go out on a date"?

Now that I'm back on the love wagon, I see that I have been looking for love in all the wrong places. Here is some local dating tip advice from me to you: these are the five (5) worst places to meet a mate in Yakima. Good luck out there! It is easy to give up on finding a mate in Yakima if you are looking for love.

1.
The Laundromat

Nobody wants to get their flirt on and make some sparks fly at the laundromat. They are too busy complaining about the price of a load of laundry (and I don't blame them). $3.00 per load in the washer is a big chunk of change if you have more than one load. I guess I'm extremely spoiled because the laundry room where I live only charges $1.50 per load, and I complained about that, too, because it used to be only just $1.00 pre-pandemic!

via GIPHY

2.
The Grocery Store

I have tried many times to make a love connection in the grocery store, to no avail. The wild thing is though, during the pandemic I got more looks and stares from men. This is likely because they were only seeing my eyes above my face mask and I must have some pretty eyes during the COVID years. Now that my mask is off, guys are going back to ignoring me again. Bummer. Thanks for nothing, COVID. Don't mind me, I'll just be in my room eating my feelings away with a thing of ice cream I got from the grocery store.

via GIPHY

3.
Picking Up the Kids After School

If you pick up your child from school, you will likely see some single parents waiting to pick up their kid(s). Some of these single parents are hot! You would think this would be the ultimate time to be flirty, but NO. These single parents are tired, sleep-deprived, sometimes disheveled and the last thing on their mind is to slip you their phone number. I know, I've tried many times and failed. Bwahaha!

via GIPHY

4.
At Downtown Summer Nights in Yakima

Every Thursday in downtown Yakima on Front St, there is a big block party with live bands, food vendors, selfie stations, a misting tent, and various other booths. Flocks of single people show up to Downtown Summer Nights, usually with their other single friends. One would think this would be the prime time to meet someone who could potentially become your mate, but NO. These single people are just there to party, dance, and catch up on the latest gossip. Unless you look like a supermodel, these single people are not going to come up to you and strike up a flirty conversation. I know this because I have gone there many, many times and the only times men have come up to me to talk will say things to me like, "Hey, you dropped a napkin on the ground back there," or "Wow, you work for a radio station? Well, I just got my amateur radio license. My antenna's pretty big, you should see it."

via GIPHY

5.
Through Online Dating Apps

You would THINK that if you sign up for a dating app and swipe right on someone and they swipe right on you, too, that you'd get asked out on a date, but NO. I am not sure what it is making this current generation of guys act so weird but I have had two guys in a row match up with me and then text me for weeks on end without asking me for a single, solitary date. One guy on Bumble even sent me a message that he really likes looking at my picture. So I texted him back, "WHY WOULD YOU SIT THERE AND STARE AT MY PICTURE WHEN THE REAL THING IS RIGHT HERE IN THE FLESH?!" His response was, "Maybe someday I'll take you out on a date!" MAYBE?? How about maybe NEXT!

via GIPHY

Moral of the story is: If you're looking for a mate in Yakima, don't try to find one at any of these above places!

CHECK IT OUT: The Best Movie Character Names of the 1980s

KEEP READING: What were the most popular baby names from the past 100 years?

More From 92.9 The Bull