You would think it would be my then 4-year-old Briana decided to decorate our tree with my carkeys when I wasn’t looking and then spending days trying to locate them in complete frustration. I replaced them weeks later. Then, we took down the tree to find my keys dangling there on a 2 foot tall branch. No, as adorable as that is, that’s not my favorite Christmas memory.

Nor was it the year we got three feet of snow on Christmas morning when we lived in the Midwest. That was pretty magical. No, my favorite Christmas memory is where my then 5’4” brother in law (BIL) decided to pick a fight with my other (BIL) who was 6’2” and had some “real skills.”

My smaller BIL was of those guys who, you know, thinks he knows Karate? He would talk about breaking boards and the like. He reminded me of Napoleon Dynamites older brother who attempted to learn the art but it never really took. But he thought he had some skills.

20th Century Fox

It was Christmas in 2013, we were at my former in-laws house. Keep in mind, my in-laws are all about appearance and how things look. Keep in mind, they are pastors of a small church in Cali, so there is a religious factor here as well.

There were about 30 of us were there. My smaller BIL seemed to have “small mans syndrome”, always looking for a fight. You know the type. Straight out of the movies right?

So there we were six of us in a circle enjoying some food and getting ready to open presents, when my smaller BIL started talking about his divorce. He had been droning on about he got “taken” and how evil his ex was for months. My other taller, bigger BIL had had enough of this and said, “Well, that’s ‘cause you are an idiot.” My taller bigger BIL was known for not mincing his words.

My smaller BIL immediately stood up and got in our BIL’s face. “What did you say?”

“I didn’t stutter – you heard me. You’re an idiot.”

This Christmas just got a whole lot more interesting.  

Fox

That’s when fists starting flying! Little BIL punched big BIL. Big mistake. He took Little BIL and slammed him to the ground. Everyone stood in shock. They rolled around on the floor tussling. There were bruises was all over their faces, hair tussled and messed up. I gotta admit, I took some sort of voyeuristic satisfaction that these two know it alls were going at it. I further enjoyed the look of the shock of horror on my In-laws faces. This does not happen in their house - but it did! My younger nephews broke it up and separated them to cool them down.

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To their credit, when the dust settled, both my BIL's apologied to each other and all, shook hands and stayed away from each other the remainder of the night. I have no idea what I got for Christmas that year that fight though was very entertaining and the best gift I received that year. Besides my Playstation 4…

 

All My Best,

The JimShow

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